At least it is a new year and we have a symbolic point for new opportunities. I am sorry you first experience with speaking to a doctor's office went so poorly. Honestly, I would not try and speak to the office staff. Most of them barely know the doctor and rarely take the time or interest in the patients that is why I suggested you speak with the nurse or medical assistant. When I tried to talk with the general staff they just got frustrated too because we are asking questions they can't answer, but they are to prideful to admit it. I would not give them too much information about your specific needs because they have a limited time to talk. The questions I asked were more specific to care such as: how much time is the first appointment, does he have a special area of interest, what types of techniques or medication does he use for weight management, and their perspective on vitamins and supplements.

I know from your entries that you live in the mid-west, but it sounds rather rural. Do try to locate the best natural food stores in your area and ask them for referrals. Call your insurance company directly for questions regarding coverage too. The office personnel would need your information to get that info for you and generally it is too much trouble for them if your not a patient. I have a negative attitude about the health care system, but I have tried to get around the barriers. Remember you catch more flies with honey....be sweet and as upbeat as you can. I know you don't feel good, but fake it for the calls it will get you the best results.

The main reason I wanted to go to a more private chat is because even though I do agree with Dr Hyman, it is a lot to change and things to learn. For most of us we are struggling just not to drink as many colas, even diet (I miss the fizz), and I still drink over a pot of coffee a day. Your wife may just be so overwhelmed that it is just easier to ignore and hate Dr. Hyman even if she know in her heart it is true. Personally I was angry with the BMI scale. I new that I was overweight extra chubby, but obese seemed a little severe and I was a 36. I am sure she is not happy about her score although Dr Hyman did not set those levels. My personal opinion is that they were set by some rich doctor with a trophy wife that is anorexic.

Anyway my point is maybe you two can come to a compromise, since I know you care about her health and yours, let her just make one or two simple changes that she feels comfortable about doing. One great trick to feel satisfied is to take fiber tables 20-30 minutes before meals. Fiber Choice has some for weight management, they taste great (really), and they can be bought at the grocery or Wal-mart. I usually just take mine with my regular vitamins. By the way if your vitamins are not right call the pharmacy and ask about a refund or exchange most places are good about that even if they are opened. Women in general need to be careful about taking iron, especially in our later years. Another change is with breakfast. If anyone starts their day with a high protein and fiber rich diet they will consume less food during the day. As I have said, cereal is my favorite breakfast. Now I always add slivered almonds and organic (not sulfured) dried fruits especially cranberries and blueberries. Two tablespoons is equal to a serving of fruit. Speaking of fruit, if she would just substitute one snack a day with an apple and peanut butter or some other healthy combo of protein and fiber. Those are just a few suggestions.

I made a similar deal with my Mom for the year. We both had to set three simple resolutions. For her she will do yoga or pray for 10 minutes everyday for flexibility and relaxation. Second she will take a good multi-vitamin. She takes supplements, but for some weird reason she doesn't take a multi at 79 I know she needs more that what she is getting for food. Third she will be more careful about who she gossips to and what she shares. I gave her permission to tell my brother or sister anything I tell her about me, but not to tell everyone else in the world. This will be her biggest challenge for the year. For me I actually picked four. One is with my daughter, who wants us to recycle. My main three that I need to tweek are use my new weights at least 3 times per week, add new techniques to Dr Hyman's diet, and reduce our debt. Although I still need to lose 50lbs to get to my target weight, I actually do not have a weight loss goal. The best part about eating the way I have for the last 6 months is that the weight will come off, period. All I have to do is limit my cheats and eat lots of healthy fruits and vegetable, throw in some exercise and I am set.

One other suggestion then I need to finish what did not get done yesterday, but my tree is down. Have you and/or your wife considered lap bands. My cousin had one put on last year. Last I heard she has lost over 50lbs and feels so much better. Losing a lot of weight takes so long and it is hard to stay motivated that I think this is an excellent choice if it is combined with health eating. It is not as painful as the gastric bypass and can be removed later once your health is under control. It is just a suggestion. Just losing 10% of your body weight can have drastic improvements in your overall health. I will skip the private chat, since I do understand how that could be a problem and I generally said here all I would have said there.

Happy New Year! May you and your wife find a comfortable balance in your lives during 2009. 2009 is Mine!

One day at a time to a healthier life.

I can understand your frustration.

Would you mind emailing me at Christina@ultrawellness.com and give me a bit more information on what you are looking for and I will see how I can help.

Crhistina

Hello ultrhound! I just joined the site and read your post from New Year's eve. Not sure how all of this works yet. I don't see any replies or new posts from you. YES! you are going to make it! I hope that things are looking up for you by now, 21 days later. I, too have been given the diagnosis of having bipolar disorder and I take a bucket load of medications. I have been going to the bookstore to read the book, and readig it online. Keep your faith in yourself. You have already come so far in taking care of yourself. It matters not that your wife doesn't like Dr. Hyman. HER problem, not yours.

I know that as long as you keep telling yourself this mantra: I am whole, healthy and complete, you will succeed when perhaps in the past you may not have succeeded. Now that you understand the connection and that your life and your success is a matter of YOUR CHOOSING to be successful, as long as you keep that in your mind, and follow your dream, you will have anything you want at your fingertips! Just keep in mind that this moment is all that matters. Don't fret about the past or tomorow. Stay focused on the NOW.

YOU are PERFECT! I believe in you! And YOU believe in YOU! And so it is!

Sandy